Birthday Girl!

I'm not going to lie: I love my birthday. I feel special, and I like people telling me "Happy Birthday!" all day long. Maybe it comes from growing up an only child and being the center of attention, but whatever. I love my birthday.

Today may have been one of the top birthdays ever, if I don't count my kindergarten birthday when there was a magician at my party (and the magician was a girl- how cool is that). I ate cookies for breakfast and got to snuggle with both of my kids before they were good and awake. One of my sweet students gave me a birthday gift. That was a completely unexpected surprise. Students and teacher friends wished me "Happy Birthday" all day long. My phone was buzzing with texts continuously. I got roses from my boys aka Phillip, the brains behind that operation. When I checked facebook, a hojillion (that's a new number I just made up) friends had written on my wall. I didn't think it could get any better!

So I went to the gym and worked out, which kicked my rear, but in a good way. I thought the best parts of my day were done and it was time for a quiet night at home. Wrong!

This is the birthday cake that Jackson and Phillip baked for me while I was at the gym.

I. Love. Cake. I won't tell you how many pieces I ate, but one person at the table did eat more than me. That was something I don't think I've ever seen happen. Perfect end to a perfect day? Not if you have a husband as cool as mine. This is what was waiting for me next:

That's not just any old sign duct taped up in my dining room. That is a sign made especially for me to run through. I had told Phillip a few weeks ago that I always thought it looked fun to run through a sign, but that I had never done it because I was a cheerleader so I was always holding the sign. So he had someone make me a sign. How spectacular is that?

I may have the most fantastic family ever, except for that one kid called me an old Grinch.

It was definitely a "King-Sized" day of blessings!

Really?!?!?!

WARNING: This post is a vent post. Don't read if you don't want to hear a little griping.

Last week Phillip and I took the boys to the pool at Tims Ford State Park. We had a fantastic day. The diving boards there are supreme - lots of bounce for flips, twists, and dives.

There was this one thing though. There were three young men there who happened to be African-American. Two of them are students at the high school where Phillip teaches and the third had already graduated. I taught the third young man, and I can honestly say that he is one of my favorite students ever. I have a picture of Grant hugging on him at homecoming his freshman year.

Now I know that I live in a small Southern town, but I guess I am naive in the thought that racism was pretty much dead. Inter-racial relationships are very common where we live, and I haven't heard overt racist comments in a long time. Until these young men decided to jump off the diving boards.

There was a group of 5-6 Caucasian kids, some of whom are fellow students of the young men, standing about 10 feet behind me in the pool, which was about 20 feet from the diving boards. If they made one racist joke about African-Americans, they made 10. They were saying disgusting things, laughing, and making fun. My blood was boiling, and the mean middle school teacher in me was ready to come out. Thankfully they never said THAT WORD or else I would have looked like Michael Phelps swimming through the pool to give them a piece of my mind. They finally left, and I was able to enjoy the rest of the day. When I told Phillip what they were saying he was just as angry as I was. I think we were both dumbfounded, too. Neither of us thought people still talked like that.

I'm glad that our children don't know about those types of people yet. Eventually they'll have to learn, but hopefully we have prepared them to fight against stereotypes and ignorance.

-Ashley

I haven't blogged recently for many reasons, but there have been 2 glaring ones. First, life has really gotten in the way. Coaching t-ball, teaching, professional development, cooking dinner, traveling to Grant's tournaments on the weekend, blah, blah, blah. I'm not telling you anything you don't already know about me or that you aren't doing in your own house. Second, nothing has happened in the way of our adoption. We are just waiting, and waiting, and waiting. But I did want to write about the feelings I was having Easter Sunday.

Easter is one of my favorite holidays. I love the renewal that comes with the day, the excitement of the children, and celebrating the Resurrection. We hosted the church egg hunt at our house, made empty tomb cookies, and made the boys each their own set of Resurrection eggs. There is hardly a flat surface in our house that isn't covered in Easter grass! However, when Phillip and I sat watching the boys discover the goodies the Easter Bunny left for them I became very sad. I truly expected to watch three children go through Easter baskets this year.


After church, we go to Phillip's cousin Lori's house for our annual family dinner and egg hunt. It is always a great afternoon. Too much food and even more fun are always on the menu. My sweet Jackson, who I think has a more direct line to my heart than anyone else in the family, says, "Mommy, where is our baby. Why don't we have her yet? It's taking a long time." I can tell you the exact location we were on the road when he opened my floodgates with those words! It was all I needed to unload all those feelings that had surfaced earlier in the morning. I think I cried the rest of the way to Murfreesboro.

Let me also say that I have been very open to accepting a child of either gender, but Jackson has decided that our baby will be a girl. I don't think I could ever choose. After all, this is all His plan. BUT:

This can't be denied. Little girls love him. And seeing him with Baby Ansley was the little bit of hope I needed to keep on going. I know there is a plan and God wouldn't have brought me on this journey without an end in sight. It's just on His time, not mine.

Keep praying for us-
Ashley

Sweetness

Jackson: Mommy, will you put my clothes on me?

Me: Of course, Sweetie. (As I'm putting on his socks) What are you going to do when we get our baby, and you're not the baby anymore?

Jackson: Be happy.

Oh my. How blessed am I to have this boy?

Testing 1,2,3...

This is Petey. He followed Phillip and the boys home one Sunday afternoon. They were on a bike ride and were over a mile from our house when he began following them. At the time, he weighed less than 6 pounds. The boys kept asking Phillip if they could keep him, and he kept telling them no even though Phillip really wanted him, too. Phillip decided that if Petey made it down the hill right before our house and turned left into the driveway he would be ours. Petey turned left into the driveway.

I really didn't need another dog. We already have Chloe. But he was so cute and so sweet, so I caved and said we could keep him.

Petey loved being at our house. He and Chloe were immediate friends, and he quickly claimed the end of Grant' s bed as his. He loved to snuggle and be a lap dog. His only problem was that he just couldn't grasp the idea of using the bathroom outside. I worked with him every spare moment I could, but the little guy was struggling. There were several times I considered giving him to someone else, but since I first saw him, I had a feeling Petey was a test. If I could pass the test with Petey, I could handle another baby. So I never gave up on him, and I am happy to say he's now housebroken.

Yay for Petey (all 9.4 pounds of him), and yay for me for passing this test.

-Ashley

The Grand Total is.....

$1,047.54

Wow! That's a lot of money for a one-day yard sale in Winchester, TN. We were so blessed to have good weather, two cute little helpers, and lots of great folks come out to the sale. So many people donated items for the sale including family members, friends, and many of my North Middle School family. Many of the shoppers bought too few cookies for too much money, or told us to "keep the change," or came back 2 or even 3 times to shop! Some friends who couldn't come passed on the email to family and friends who did come over. To all of you we say, "Thank You!" We also want to say thanks to:

• the friend and colleague of Phillip's who came with a $50 check and bought 2 Rescue Hero toys and 2 chocolate chip cookies.
  
• the lady who cleans parking lots for a living who bought a box full of stuff, and, when Phillip told her to "pay whatever you think it's worth," gave him a $50 bill because, "you've got to pass it on when something good happens to you."
• my hairdresser, because she donated my haircut that afternoon so we could put the money in the adoption fund.
• the man who came in his military uniform after his shift ended at the Air Force base and handed Phillip an envelope, said, "I hope this helps. I found it in a fish's mouth," and walked off. We don't even know your name, but we sure do appreciate the $400 that was in that envelope.
  

We were hoping to make about $300 from the yard sale and obviously surpassed that. But more than the money, Phillip and I were truly touched by the kindness of the people who helped us, gave us words of encouragement, or are now praying for us in this journey.

Love,
Ashley

How Much Does it Cost? How Are We Paying for It?

I have been putting off writing this post since I started this blog. I don't like to talk about money (who does?), but if someone considering adoption is reading this blog, it might help them make a decision.

When I first asked a friend how much an adoption cost, I was floored. When she told me they were prepared to spend upwards of $30,000 to adopt from Ethiopia, I couldn't believe it. Phillip's response was, "They sure make it hard to help." That's what I was feeling, too. At the time, I wasn't fully surrendered to the idea of adoption, and really didn't know how we'd ever come up with that kind of money. And adopting from Ethiopia is one of the more economical countries from which to adopt!

After we decided to follow God's plan and jump in, we had to decide exactly where to adopt from, and finances definitely played a part in our decision. After much prayer, we decided to adopt domestically, and not to use an agency. Going through an agency for a domestic adoption could still cost us between $15,000 and $20,000, which is really more than 2 school teachers can afford right now! We are hoping to adopt privately and keep the cost under $8,000. Here are the things we're doing to pay for our adoption.

• We opened up a separate savings account at a bank other than our "regular" bank. I didn't want to be tempted to touch the adoption money for other things.
  
• I have been cutting back on everything I possibly can. I am a notorious clothes, shoe, and handbag fanatic, but I haven't purchased anything new that wasn't absolutely necessary since the spring. I also went as long as I could without coloring my hair, but once it began looking like it belonged on a scarecrow, I gave in! I've also been clipping coupons, watching the weekly circulars, and trying to only buy what we need at the grocery, which is very difficult!
  
• I am privately tutoring a student every afternoon. This opportunity just fell into my lap one day as I was walking through the school office, proving to me that God will provide.
  
• I don't go to Murfreesboro to shop at Target like I used to. The last time I went, I spent $50, all on necessities, like paper towels and razor blades. A year ago I couldn't get out of there for under $200, and I usually went once a month!
• I took lots of clothes to our local consignment sale rather than give the clothes away.
  
• My amazing friend, Leanne McCullough, has been my biggest cheerleader and fund raiser. She takes beautiful pictures, and her new lifestyle photography business is really taking off. She and I planned a "Summer Fun" photo shoot. Many of our friends brought their kids to our house to play in the sprinkler, jump on the trampoline, and eat popsicles and watermelon, all while Leanne took pictures. Each session lasted about 30 minutes, and Leanne took some of the most beautiful pictures, some of which (my favorites) you saw at the top of this post. We're doing another photo shoot this Saturday at a pumpkin patch, and another for Christmas card pictures next month.
  
• We will be having a yard and bake sale October 22nd. We will take your junk!
  
• Leanne and I will be making fudge and peanut brittle to sell between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Place your orders now!

For now, this is what we have planned. We will do more in the spring, I'm sure. I have no worries about paying for this adoption. I know God wouldn't have placed me on this path without providing the means to finish the journey.

Ashley